Is True Love Worth Waiting For?
by Wawesome
Summary: Jude has moved out to California and she plans to stay there. It's been 5 years since she left when someone surprises her saying that they miss her. Will Jude go back to the life she once had or will she stick to the new one she has created for herself?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Another new story from yours truly! Enjoy and please review!**

Jude plopped the mail on the kitchen table and went to make herself a cup of coffee. She sat at the table, mug in hand, and rifled through the mail with a yawn.

"Junk mail, junk mail, junk mail…hmm…what's this?" A big beige envelope had caught her eye. It was addressed to Jude Harrison. "It's been five years since someone has called me by that name," she said softly. Since she had moved out to California when she was 18 she had officially changed her name to Lauren Johansen. She looked for the return address, and found there wasn't one. Curiously, she opened it and a CD fell out. She picked it up and went to put it in her CD player above the sink. A familiar voice rang out.

_Where does it hurt?  
Tell me cause I understand  
The words of a heart  
Beating like wings in…_

It was her own voice. The sound of it brought tears to her eyes. It was the last song she had ever recorded. The last time she had seen…him. She never got the chance to here the finished product, or to say goodbye. The longer she listened to it the harder it became to hold back the tears. She could still picture G-Major as if she had been there yesterday. She could still see the studios and the busy people that she cared about around her. Still picture Karma, Spied, and the rest of the SME boys messing around while Sadie tried to maintain order. And Kwest would be in the kitchen making a huge sandwich while watching Sadie trying to run everything all by herself. Then Jamie could be found trying to convince Darius into another record deal. But lastly, there was him. Tommy, the best producer she ever had. It was entirely his fault she had left in the first place. Well, maybe not _entirely_ his fault. But close enough.

_Where does it hurt?_

The song ended and she was just about to stop the player when a second song started to play. The moment she heard his voice a huge smile spread across her face.

_And why do I need?  
Why do I need someone else?  
Cause you comfort me  
You show me how to be myself_

_Another late night and a radio  
Turn the dial to another sad song_

_And all I need is a day inside  
Inside your mind to see what it's like  
And all I'm missing in you I see  
Am I who you want? Am I what you need?_

_Why do you see?  
Why do you see someone else?  
Cause I'm losing sleep  
I feel like time is running out_

_If you had called an hour ago  
This basement might not be so cold_

_And all I need is a day inside  
Inside your mind to see what it's like  
And all I'm missing in you I see  
Am I who you want? Am I what you need?_

_Whoa…Whoa…_

_And why do I need…  
Why do I need someone else?_

When all I need is a day inside  
Inside your mind to see what it's like  
And all I'm missing in you I see  
Am I who you want? Am I what you need?

_Whoa…Whoa…_

_Am I what you need?_

The song ended and Jude, still smiling, took the CD out and went back to sit at the table. She was impressed. She had never heard a song by him that sounded so beautiful, that had so much depth. The doorbell rang and Jude jumped knocking her coffee all over her shirt.

"My favorite shirt!" she cried as she grabbed a towel and went to get the door.

"Good morning Lauren," said Sean as she opened the door while still trying to save her shirt.

"Oh hey," she said looking up as she let him in. Sean had been her boyfriend for the last two months. She had finally thought that she was ready to move on from _him_. But from her reaction to his song now she wasn't quite so sure anymore. "I spilled coffee all over my favorite shirt," she said as she followed him into the kitchen.

"Yeah well, you always were a little bit clumsy," he said as he poured himself a cup of coffee. Jude glared at him until he looked up. "Just kidding," he said with a smile. "You know I love you."

"Yeah, right," she said as they both sat at the table.

"Why do you always do that?" he asked as she was still trying to clean off her shirt.

"Do what?" she said looking up.

"Every time I say I love you think I'm joking."

"I didn't say…"

"You didn't say that but you never say it back," he said staring at her. She knew he was right. She really did like Sean, but love him? She wasn't sure.

"You know that I do though," she said staring back at him with her big eyes.

"Then say it, tell me that you love me," he said looking into her eyes.

"I…I…," he looked at her intently. "I love you," she said finally.

"You're lying."

"What?!"

"You're flat out lying; I can see it in your eyes."

'Sean I…"

"Just tell me, is there someone else?"

"There's no one else Sean I…"

"Then what's wrong why can't you love me?"

"I do love you it's just that…"

"It's just that what? You're too caught up with Tom Quincy still?"

"I…what?" she said in shock. "How do you know about Tommy?"

"I, he's my cousin."

"And you didn't tell me? What else do you know?" she said as she stood up.

"All I know is that you and Tommy were really close, you're name used to be Jude, and you used to have blonde hair." Jude was speechless.

"I…I…"

"You don't have to say anything. But I think it's obvious that Tommy really likes you, and maybe you really like him?"

"Sean, you have to understand…that was five years ago. I am so…"

"Don't lie to me again. I know you too well." He paused. "I know that you still like him, probably love him. I've seen the pictures you have of him in your room."

"Under my bed," she said innocently.

"Still, I get the point." He stood up as well.

"Are you leaving?" she asked as he walked toward the door.

"I have plans for today."

"But I thought we had plans…" He turned and looked at her.

"We did," he said as he opened the door.

"So what is this goodbye for now or…?"

"This is just…goodbye," he said as he left.

"But Sean I…" but he just kept on walking. "Great," she said as she closed the door. "It's been five whole years and I still have feelings for the guy that made me come out here in the first place!"

Jude went back to the kitchen and picked up the envelope. A letter fell out. She picked it up, along with the CD, and took it to her room. She opened it as she closed the door.

_ Dear Jude,_

_ Or should I say dear Lauren? I really don't know what to say. The last  
time I saw you was 5 years ago when your name was still Jude and you  
had blonde hair._

'How did he know I dyed my hair brown?' she thought for a moment. 'Well duh, Sean must have sent him pictures and Tommy must have sent some to him.'

_ I still can't believe you just left like that. I just…I don't know. So anyway  
how's Sean treating you? Yes I know Sean; he sent me pictures of his new  
'girlfriend'._

'So he knows that I have, or at least had, a boyfriend. That's awkward,' she thought as she tried to imagine his reaction. 'Yes, very awkward.'

_ Sean's the one who told me that you changed your name and dyed your  
hair. Of course he didn't know that until I told him._

"You also told him that we were very close," she said out loud.

_ I really just wrote to tell you that…well that I miss you. I really, really do.  
Anyhow, hope you liked the CD, you sound amazing in it. And just so you  
know…I wrote that song especially for you._

Jude let out a small gasp.

_ Because remember Jude…I still love you._

Jude's eyes watered up.

_ Love Always,  
Tommy Q._

Jude finished reading the letter and then just started crying. She missed him too. But most importantly, he still loved her. Well what if she still loved him too? 'No,' she thought to herself. 'You can't still love him. He'll just hurt you again. But what if I don't care?' Jude let out a sigh. It didn't matter anyway, she was never going back.

**A/N: Okay so please tell me what you think. Thanks!**


	2. The Past is Here to Haunt Me Again

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait guys, computer problems. Anyway, enjoy and please review!**

The next morning Sean came over again.

"Hi," he said as she answered the door. She didn't answer so he went on. "Can I come in?" Still she just stared at him not knowing what to say that wouldn't sound stupid. "Uh Lauren, look I…"

"Who's Lauren? I thought I was just Jude Harrison who is apparently still in love with Little Tommy Q. From Boyz Attack and has no life whatsoever," she said as he sighed.

"Lauren, I mean Jude, I'm sorry I went off on you like that yesterday. I didn't mean…I know I don't really know happened back then between the two of you, but I do know that I still really do love you." Jude let a breath out as she let him in.

"I'm sorry too," she said as she closed the door and turned to talk to him. "But maybe you were right."

"What?" he said as she sat on the sofa next to him.

"You're right," she said as he looked at her with a serious face. "I thought about what you said yesterday all night and I've come to a conclusion." She took a deep breath before continuing. "I think…I know that I never actually moved on from Tommy. So when I and you got together I thought that this would help me finally move on. But I guess I was wrong."

"So wait," he thought for a second. "So really you were just using me?"

"No!" she said as she grabbed his hand. "I really like you Sean. I think you're a great guy. But I just don't like you the way you like me." Sean sighed as and pulled his hand out of her grasp.

"I have to go. I'm late for work."

"I'm really sorry Sean," she said as he stood up.

"Just…just be careful with Quincy. He's hurt a lot of people before," he said as he left. 'It was for the best,' she thought to herself as she tried not to cry.

-------------------------------------------

A little later that day Jude went out to the corner store a few blocks from her little house. As she was walking through the parking lot she bumped into someone. They both fell over. When she looked up she saw a familiar face.

"Sadie?" Jude said as she stood up.

"Jude!" she said as she helped her up.

"What are you…?" Sadie hugged her and stopped her mid sentence.

"I was just going over to you're house for a visit since you sent me your address."

"Wow I can't…" Jude hugged her sister again.

"So are you busy today? Please say no." Sadie said as she looked over her sister. "I was thinking maybe we could spend the day together and catch up, after all it's been 5 years. By the way I love your new look. You look great as a brunette."

"Oh thanks," she said unconsciously touching her hair. "Um, I'm kind of busy right now, but we could go out for lunch if you want."

"Ok that sounds great! What do you recommend around here?"

"There's this great little café not too far from here."

"Do you mean _The Lucky Café_?"

"Yeah, have you been there already?"

"I was thinking about it but…"

"Ok well then we can have lunch there and catch up and stuff."

"Alright so how about 12:00?"

"That sounds perfect. That gives me just enough time to do what I had planned."

"So then I won't keep you if you're really, really busy. I mean if you can't spend just one whole day with your sister you haven't seen in 5 years but…"

"Sadie," Jude said as she crossed her arms.

"Ok, alright. See you then," she said as she hugged her sister one last time before she ran off. Jude rolled her eyes as she went into the store. 'Same old Sadie,' she thought to herself as she grabbed what she wanted off the shelf.

Jude was in and out of the store in less than 5 minutes. She rushed back home and went straight to work on her new image.

-------------------------------------------

Jude looked in the mirror with a smile. It was prefect, exactly how she had imagined it. She looked over at her clock and saw that it was almost 12 already. She grabbed her keys and headed out the door.

She arrived at the café just as Sadie arrived too. She parked her car and went out to meet her. Sadie smiled widely as she saw her sister approaching.

"So that's what you were so busy with," she said as Jude stood in front of her.

"Do you like it?" she said running her fingers through her new black hair.

"Yeah I do! It gives you a sort of edge. I like that look on you. It fits you well."

"Thanks," she said as the two sisters linked arms and walked into the café.

They sat at a table on the outside patio. For a while they just made small talk. Then Sadie asked the most anticipated question.

"Um, Jude?" Sadie started out carefully. Jude looked up at her sister.

"What?" she said carelessly.

"Um…okay I have to ask you. Why did you leave the way you did?" Jude stared at her sister. "I know you probably don't want to talk about it, but I need to know. We all miss you so much and Tommy…"

"Sadie please just stop," Jude said calmly. Her sister looked at her with concern. "I've already made up my mind. I'm not going back, ever. And as for why I left…" she shook her head.

"Look I know this may be hard," Sadie said as she reached across the table and grabbed Jude's hand. "But you need to come back. You've been gone away from home long enough. I don't care why you left but Jude," Sadie stared at her sister, "Tommy's a wreck without you." That was it. She had hit a nerve.

"Why should I care what the hell is wrong with him!" she yelled as she stood up. "I don't care anymore and this is my home now!"

"Ok I see that you are mad at him and all but…"

"But nothing! And don't tell me that I should forgive and forget everything that he did to me because I can't, and I've tried," she said as she began to walk away.

"Jude just wait a second!" Sadie called as she threw some money on the table and chased after her. "I'm not telling you to forgive him! But either way I have to tell you something!" Jude stopped for a second.

"What is it? What could you possibly say that would change my mind about going back or anything else?!" she screamed at her sister as tears began to fall from her eyes.

"Jude, he still loves you." Jude stood there listening to her sister closely. "And from what I see you still love him too."

"But that's where you're wrong," she said with a serious voice. "I don't still love him. I never will love him again."

"Jude don't lie to yourself like that. You know as well as I that…"

"Goodbye Sadie," Jude said as she got in her car and drove away.

Jude drove up to her house without noticing the familiar blue viper across the street. She was almost to the door when she looked up and saw him sitting on her front steps.

"Jude," he said as she stood frozen to the spot.


	3. Some Wounds Won't Heal

**A/N: Here's chapter 3! Please review and enjoy!!**

"Jude," he said again as she just stared at him. She stood stock still barely breathing. She certainly wasn't expecting this. Tommy got up and walked towards her. She wanted to run away back to her car but she couldn't move. Heck she could barely blink from all the shock. Tommy stood in front of her now. She looked him over. He looked basically the same except…tired was the word. He looked as if hadn't slept in days, months even. And on top of that he looked slightly stressed as well.

"I…" she didn't know what to say. She was actually speechless. And now she was actually hoping, almost praying, that Sadie had followed her home. But no such luck. She probably knew he was going to be here.

Tommy looked her over. She looked pretty much the same only a little older and she had dyed her hair yet again, this time black. He liked it. It gave her a kind of edge. All in all, he thought she looked absolutely gorgeous.

"Are you okay?" he asked as she bit her bottom lip, a nervous habit of hers. She continued to stare at him. 'Don't look into his eyes, don't look into his eyes…,' she told herself. "Jude?"

"I…" She walked past him, finally getting feeling back into her legs, and went inside. She left the door open hoping he would get the signal to follow her inside. Then she went and sat on the sofa waiting for him.

Realizing she had left the door open for him, Tommy went inside. As he was closing the door he spotted her on the couch sitting patiently for him. He went over and sat next to her. For a moment they sat in silence.

"Jude please talk to me," he said in a begging voice.

"What do you want me to say?" she finally said in a flat tone.

"Anything! Scream, yell, whatever. I don't know what you want _me_ to say."

"How about an apology for what you did?" she said coldly.

"What are you talking about? You're the one who went and left without so much as a goodbye," he said trying to keep his voice level. "I think you owe some apologies starting with me."

"Do you even know why I left Tommy?" she asked looking up at him.

"No, nobody does. All I know is that one day you just kind of disappeared and…'

"It was because of you Tommy!" she yelled. He stared at her, speechless. Jude put her head in her hands.

"What did I do that made you feel like you had to leave?" he asked softly. Jude looked up.

"Well, let's see," she said standing up and starting to pace. "First off we finally get together and then by the next day we're broken up and I haven't the slightest clue why. Then that night I see you kissing my sister!" she said stopping to look at him. "But then things only get more interesting. Then after a while I go and hook up with my best friend Jamie. Next thing I know it looks like you were trying to break us up! Why Tommy? Why would you want to do that? Why would it matter to you who I was with if we were broken up? And what do you know, before long you succeeded and broke us up. So after you break us up you come and tell me that you want to get back together? After everything you just did?" Jude took a deep breath. "I thought what the heck. I gave you one last chance to prove yourself to me. And then what happens? You screw up again! You break it off again for no apparent reason. So you want to know why I left Tommy. It was because of you. You were making my life so confusing and frustrating that I had no choice but to run." Tommy put his head in his hands.

"I promise you I did everything for a reason. I can explain everything if you just give me a chance," he said through his hands.

"It's not that hard to figure out," she said as she stared at him coldly. "You just like to hurt and confuse people. It's just that you can't care about anyone but your damn self," she said as he looked up at her.

"You know what, I don't even know why I came to see you in the first place," he said as he stood up. "One thing's for sure though…5 years haven't really changed you."

"Yeah and it didn't do anything for you either you're still…" Tommy grabbed Jude around the waist and pulled her into a hard kiss. Jude couldn't pull back, her heart wouldn't let her.

"Please just let me explain," he said when they finally pulled away. Jude shook her head.

"I came here to get away from everything. I can't…I won't fall for it again," she said looking anywhere but at him. "No matter how much I…I still love you, this will never work out." Tommy let go of her.

"You can't tell me that didn't mean anything," he said as she turned to look at him. They stared into each other's eyes.

"I...I…" she was drowning in his deep blue eyes yet again. "I love you so much Tommy, but I don't want to get hurt again. I wouldn't be able to handle it."

"You have to believe me. I never meant to hurt you in the first place." Jude sat back on the couch.

"Then can you explain to me what happened all those years ago?" He sat down next to her.

"I can try," he said honestly. Jude grabbed his hand and nodded.

-------------------------------------------

"So wait, it was Darius who didn't want us together?"

"Yeah, he didn't want it to interfere with your music career."

"So why didn't you tell me?" she said crossing her arms.

"Well, he told me that if we didn't break it off both of us would be fired. So I knew if I told you, you would say you didn't care and quit. I didn't want you to lose everything you had worked for over me."

"Oh," she said uncrossing her arms and smiling a little. 'He's too sweet…but still he should have told me,' she thought to herself. "Ok I understand that much, but you still have a lot of explaining to do. So why were you kissing my sister two seconds after we had broken up?"

"About that, that wasn't my fault. Sadie just came up to me and sort of cornered me. You saw how she had me pushed against the wall." Jude thought about it for a moment. It was true that it did look like he was cornered.

"I guess I never did let you explain what happened and maybe I did kind of overreact since we were over with already, but what about when you trying to break me and Jamie up?" Jude thought she knew the answer to this one.

"Now for that I was just being jealous. I figured it didn't matter what Darius said and we would work around it." Jude smiled.

"You were actually jealous?" she asked with a smirk.

"Don't get used to it," he said loving to see her smile again.

"Ok so one last thing. Why did you break up with me again after I had given you a second chance? I thought everything was going so well." Tommy sighed.

"This time I had a better reason than just because Darius said so," Jude looked at him with concern. "Ok well…me and Portia well um…we never officially got divorced."

"WHAT?!"

"I know a shocker. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to get hurt again which obviously didn't work out so super well."

"You should have told me. I wouldn't have been mad just…I would have felt a little awkward I guess, but I would have gotten over it." Jude paused for a moment. "I owe you an apology to you. One for leaving the way I did and two for not giving you a chance to explain everything. I'm really sorry," she said as he smiled at her.

"It's okay, we both made mistakes. By the way I love your new hair." Jude frowned for a moment.

"Oh yeah!" she said realizing she had dyed it that morning. "I forgot I had even done that with all the drama today." Tommy grinned as he ruffled her hair. She smiled back at him.

"So now what?" he said as they both just looked at each other.

"Well I wrote a song this morning which was amazing because I haven't sang or wrote anything in 5 years."

"Can I hear it?" Jude thought for a moment. "You don't have to if you don't want to I mean…"

"Let me get my guitar," she said as she stood up. "Oh and by the way I love that song you wrote for me."

"You liked it?" he said as she went to her room.

"I loved it!" she said as she came back with her guitar. "It was so deep. I was really impressed." Tommy suppressed a smile.

"You ready?" Jude nodded as she started to strum her guitar.

_Everyday I sit here waiting  
Everyday just seems so long  
And now I've had enough of all the hating  
Do we even care, it's so unfair  
Any day it'll all be over  
Everyday there's nothing new  
And I'll just try to find some hope  
To try to hold on to  
But it starts again  
It'll never end_

_I'm heavily broken  
And I don't know what to do  
Can't you see that I'm choking  
And I can't even move  
When there's nothing left to say  
What can you do  
I'm heavily broken  
And there's nothing I can do_

_Almost giving up on trying  
Almost heading for a fall  
And now my mind is screaming out  
I've got to keep on fighting  
But then again  
It doesn't end_

_I'm heavily broken  
And I don't know what to do  
Can't you see that I'm choking  
And I can't even move  
When there's nothing left to say  
What can you do  
I'm heavily broken  
And there's nothing I can do_

_Feels like I'm drowning  
I'm screaming for air  
Louder I'm crying  
And you don't even care_

_I'm heavily broken  
And I don't know what to do  
Can't you see that I'm choking  
And I can't even move  
When there's nothing left to say  
What can you do  
I'm heavily broken_

_I'm heavily broken  
And I don't know what to do  
Can't you see that I'm choking  
And I can't even move  
When there's nothing left to say  
What can you do  
I'm heavily broken  
I'm heavily broken  
I'm heavily broken_

Jude finished and opened her eyes. He was staring right at her.

"Jude," he said softly. "I never knew that…" Jude held up her hand to quite him.

"You don't have to say anything. Today has changed a lot of things. Some problems have been solved...but some wounds just don't seem to heal as easily," she said as she stood up and walked away. This song had reminded her of how she had been feeling for the last few years. How could she just give into his apology and explanation that easily?


End file.
